Another New Book Just Out by Farmer And Hunter Kerry Butler.

EXCERPT FROM THE BOOK

When telling the odd steamy tale about women, I mean no disrespect to them.  T he trouble is though, these days attitudes aren't as relaxed – and there are people about with no sense of humour – who are easily offended – due to the fact that they are just too PC, prudish or precious in their outlook on life.  But there is a solution though:  They should learn to chill out;  or just burn the blinking book and be done with.

As far as women are concerned, I happen to think they're lovely creatures.  Besides which, they are caring and understanding.  And show a genuine interest in others.  I actually enjoy talking to women; simply because they don’t have the male ego getting in the way.

To tell you the truth, I find it hard to understand how women put up with men.  Because let’s face it, males can be fairly basic in their outlook on life.  Not to mention the fact that their personal habits and hygiene standards often leave a lot to be desired.

To women, a lot of men must seem uncouth creatures.  They are slovenly, untidy, greedy, useless about the house, uncaring, insensitive, untrustworthy, selfish, unreliable, inconsiderate, lecherous, possessive, demanding, grumpy, impatient, intolerant, domineering, arrogant, chauvinistic, self-centered egotists.

Phew, as far as negatives go, that’s quite some list.  But we shouldn’t be too hard on the male of the species because there has been a vast change in recent times.

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This latest book by farmer and hunter Kerry Butler is a revised version of his previous publication ‘Blimmin Heck’ which in a review, has been summed up as “ a ripper ”.

Combined with it, is his limited-edition book ‘Bush Block’ which a reviewer has described as “ a real cracker .”

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Hobbit house .

The hollow trunk of an old willow tree where this sheep took up residence.

As a farmer, I’m able to observe such special little moments that occur every so often throughout the adventure called life.

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Below are snippets from some of the chapters throughout the book.

At the end you can see where copies are available for purchase.

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CATCHING BIG EELS

W hen growing up as a kid in the 1950's and 60's life was an adventure … with the only requirement being the imagination to dream up our next escapade.

What great times, roaming free and wild without a care in the world. Catching eels in the creek was always high on the list of exciting adventures.

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A big eel that I caught later in life .

Standing in the boat is Liz, my best mate and fishing crew.

Gathered around are neighbourhood kids who lost interest in swimming after seeing this monster.

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A STRIP SHOW

W hen it comes to reliving some of my varied experiences, this one is etched firmly in my memory for its excitement value at the time:  Ye ars ago, when I started farm work, the agrichemical companies which supplied sheep drench and stuff like that, had giveaways such as raincoats and umbrellas – with their logo emblazoned all over them, I might add.  There were other so-called free gifts, such as woollen blankets and jackets.  And if you were purchasing around the Christmas period, you’d get a ham.

One time, right out of the blue, quite unexpectedly a company rep decided, in his wisdom, to turn on a strip show for the young farmers in our district.  I can’t imagine what on earth possessed him to come up with such an idea, but we were certainly all for it.

The show, which consisted of a fairly hard looking girl who’d been hired to come from a big city quite some distance away, was being held at our local country pub at Tikokino in Central Hawkes Bay.

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A FISHING COMPETITION

We headed to the surfcasting competition that was being held on the coast at Napier – where we muscled our way into the long line of anglers which stretched for miles along the beach.

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Trophy snapper hanging in my old beach cottage.

This is the sort of thing I hoped to catch in the competition.

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A TOUGH BOSS

I must tell you about a farmer I once worked for.  This old guy didn’t believe in wasting money; so instead of going to town and buying ropes, we had to save the baling twine off the hay bales when feeding out – then on wet days we’d stand in the shed plaiting several strands together, and joining, until we had long lengths suitable for use as ropes.

Another tiresome wet day job was to sit in the wool shed beside the huge pile of dags that get thrown aside during shearing – and cut the little bits of wool off the dags with a pair of scissors.

You were also expected to earn your wage by doing a full day’s work.  I remember one Christmas Eve I had all my chores finished by four o'clock, so asked if I could knock off an hour early and go to town to do my Christmas shopping.  The old bugger told me I could fill in till five, by bucketing out some concrete stock-water-troughs and give them a good scrubbing with a brush, before refilling with clean water.

This old character wasn’t just mean ... he was tough with it.  He hired someone to do some scrub-cutting out the back of the farm one time, and shortly after this guy started work on his first morning, the boss turned up on his horse to see how he was going, and happened to notice the scrub cutter was still wearing his jacket – so promptly sacked him on the spot – because he couldn’t have been working very hard if he still had his wind-breaker on!

When it came to stock work, you didn't just do a full day's work … you went from daylight till dark.  A smart-aleck young shepherd and the boss were riding their horses past the chook-house one morning, and the young guy asked: “are those perching pullets”?  The boss says “what do you mean by that”?  And the shepherd replied: “well, when we go to work they’re perching, and when we get home from work they’re perching.”

He was told to pack his bags.

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A PASSION FOR HUNTING

Hunting is something that I happen to have a strong passion for, but I must admit the attraction isn't just about killing deer.  It is more to do with being in the bush … and enjoying all that nature has to offer.

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One of nature’s marvels .

A wild bee-hive I discovered in the bush.

What a work of art.

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A genuine wild-bred stag that I hunted free range.

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Of course, hunting these days is more for sport than necessity.  Interestingly, women are really getting into too.   And there is the added bonus of truly organic meat to eat as a result of it.  Not to mention trophy antlers to display and admire.

It is quite a tragic situation to have got into where we’ve come to the point that it’s necessary to be discreet about who you talk to when admitting that you are a “hunter”.  Because to be categorized as such, can put you right at the bottom of the barrel in the minds of the ‘snowflakes’ who can’t handle the thought of anyone killing game species.

The fact that it’s a natural part of nature that has gone on for millennia, is apparently, beside the point.

Those same idealistic greenie (dreamy) types are so naive in their mindset that they’d also like to put a stop to the practice of farming animals for meat.

But like many of their ilk, these despising types who do seem to love to hate, are blatant hypocrites.  The fact is, they are hell-bent on saving animals ... and yet, will turn a blind eye to the way so many humans treat their own kind.

It needs to be pointed out that 'normal' people never condone cruelty to animals.  But, the fanatical ‘save the animal’ crew go overboard in their singleminded mission.  They even want animals to be granted the same 'rights' as humans.  Obsessive types without enough else to do, always seem to take things one step too far.

Instead of turning hunters and livestock farmers into social pariahs, the 'protesters' amoungst us should get their priorities right, i.e. be concerned for their fellow humans – and go all out to save us from ourselves.  Because if they were genuinely sincere about being kind and concerned, then they would really kick up a fuss about the child abuse, domestic violence, robbery, rape, murder, and all the other nasty things humans do to each other.

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DOGS

O ne of the special things life has to offer us humans, I would suggest, is the companionship and loyalty of dogs.  They will work their hearts out for us, and expect nothing in return.  Horses are another special animal that are happy to serve us, but they can’t compare with the friendliness of dogs.  Cats also serve a purpose as pets, but the trouble with them is, being somewhat aloof, they tend to have us at their beck and call.  And we’re tolerated on their terms.

I’m what you might describe as a dog person.  I could not live my life without one.

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GOOD DOG TRAITS

Dogs never expect cards or gifts.

They don’t shop.

You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go in an instant.

Dogs love long trips.

Dogs understand instincts are better than asking directions.

They never criticise.

Dogs agree it’s okay to raise your voice to make your point.

They don’t cry.

Dogs do not want to hear about other people's “perfect” dogs.

Dogs forget that you swore at them only two minutes ago.

They have no use for flowers or jewellery.

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Gyp .

My Labrador X German Shorthaired Pointer.

With a Fallow buck (stag) we hunted together.

He's propped up for the photo session.

The reason why I really enjoy having a dog is not only for companionship, but I also use them whilst hunting in the bush.  The dog stays beside you, and when it scents a deer, it points or otherwise ‘indicates’ the presence of that animal.  So basically, all the dog does is warn you when they smell something.  You’re then able to put all your effort into stalking carefully in that direction.  They’re also handy for tracking deer that, after being shot, have run off through the thick bush, before dropping.

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Meg, my latest pup .

A Hungarian Vizsla X NZ Heading Dog

With a 12-point Red stag.

He’d been wallowing in a mud hole during the rut.

When I imitated the “roar” of a rival stag, he charged towards us.

Talk about exciting.

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GETTING OLD

O ne thing I can tell you is that life is short.  We each of us are privileged to be here so should make the most of it.  Life is for living and having fun.

I consider myself extremely fortunate in that I’ve had a fantastic life, full of hilarious escapades.  Although, you could be forgiven for thinking I must have been a bit of a tear-away in my time.  Yeah, too right I was; and what fun I had.  A lot of which you haven’t even heard about.

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A 1960 ' s pop star in the making.

Oh to be a teenager again .

I can say I have no regrets about what I might have missed out on because I really have lived life to the full, by treating it as an adventure to be enjoyed.  Imagine if, after reaching old age I’d had to face up to the fact that I had been a Boff (boring old fart) my whole life:  and, didn’t even have any stories worth telling.  Blow that for a joke.

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The above sample excerpts are just little snippets taken from a few of the chapters.

There are a total of 36 chapters in the book.

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Copies of ‘Life is an Adventure’ can be purchased by mail order.

And they're on SPECIAL

Reduced from $46. down to only $24.99

Just email your postal address to: [email protected]

A Bank Account number will be emailed back to you.

There are also a limited number available at Paper Plus in Taupo.

If you wish to contact the author, phone Kerry on: 027 4455 182

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